Pay R149 for a 45-minute Chinese massage and cupping at Golden Finger Massage, valued at R400 (save 63%)

From balloons to wristwatches and laptops to cheap candy, turn it upside down and chances are that underneath it’ll say ‘made in China’, in fact, the craze has now reached the stage that plants from the area naturally grow the phrase in their root systems. Use today’s Groupon to enjoy yet another wonder from the East; pay R149 for a 45-minute Chinese massage and cupping at Golden Finger Massage, valued at R400.

Contrary to what some may believe, the staff’s fingers are not coated in gold nor do they possess the Midas touch, which would in fact turn you into a golden version of yourself. Rather Golden Finger Massage got its name from the quality of service their staff delivers. Like in any other field, gold signifies the crème de la crème and the massage parlour is no different. Therapists at the spa are highly qualified in the art of Chinese massage and cupping, and much like Pandas dispose of bamboo they will dispose of your stress and tension.

Chinese cupping massage is an ancient, traditional method that, as the name would suggest, involves cups and massaging at the same time. Unlike tea cups, the cups used in the treatment are made from special medical silicone and are placed upside down on your body and create suction and are then either left in place or moved around with the aid of massage oils. The suction creates blood flow to the area which increases circulation and in turn brings about deep relaxation.

The process is completely non-invasive and highly-hygienic, and all you have to worry about is driving home in a state of extreme relaxation. Benefits are numerous and include pain relief, improving chi energy flow, drainage of excess toxins and lymph fluids, releasing of knots and stiffness, improving scars, reducing cellulite and relaxing muscles.

Bound Fact: After an entire binding factory was x-rayed using a revolutionary new self-propelled, flying x-ray machine, it was discovered that in fact the factory was not a factory at all but rather; a massive massage parlour catering to Kodiak bears exclusively. For a long time it was believed that the bears were reclusive in nature but this discovery showed that they merely preferred massage parlours to dusty caves.