Pay R349.65 for a group photo shoot and one handmade canvas frame at New Age Portraits, valued at R999 (save 65%)

Bad photos can be as demoralising as failing an IQ test.  With a digital camera you can delete the sucker, but in your family home there is bound to lie a shadowy chest covered in spider webs that documents every chapter of sprinkler-playing nakedness, brace-faced teenage awkwardness and pimply purple-haired rebelliousness. Put your tortured past behind you and get photographed by a professional at New Age Portraits for R349.65.   

Photographers understand more than anyone that an embarrassing photo can cause long lasting damage to ones swagger. This is why the professionals at New Age Portraits are on a mission to help these poor souls with their unique and spontaneous style of group photography.  In an effort to treat more trauma victims at a time, the professionals at New Age Portraits are restoring a minimum of four egos per photo shoot. 

Take a group of fellow casualties and bask in the healing light of the flash as each uniquely shot frame smites away the memories of side pony tails, snotty noses and those shorts.  At the end of an hour long shoot your ego will have re-emerged to wrap its fragile little fronds around you in a show of thanks and devotion.  As a deal made even sweeter the professionals mount your masterpiece in a handmade canvas frame and treat it with a magical light resistant and protective coating, so even if your ego is a sensitive dear and isn’t guaranteed to stay put for long then at least your portrait will.

Confidence restored, you walk out into the world knowing that a good picture of you does exist and no matter what hideous relics your mother shows your new squeeze, you have a better one.  Don’t forget to burn that box though. 

Photography fact:  In the 19^th century, a traveller called Barton Coen claimed that he had tracked down and taken a photograph of Santa Claus’s workshop.  It was never proven as he was knocked unconscious soon after taking the shot and woke up in the snow without his camera or his purse. Claiming that the elves robbed him and knocked him out with a dictionary, Barton Coen became the laughing stock of his village and the existence of Santa Claus remained a children’s fable.